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Fluoride Court Case You Wont See On TV.
I have a weed problem.
Like so many other compliant sheeple, I took the COVID-19 pandemic as an opportunity to maximize my consumption of food, alcohol and mind-numbing streaming entertainment. March melted into April; April washed away and suddenly it was May. I stepped outside my suburban home and realized -- I have a weed problem.
Dandelions had popped up all over, thick, dense and tall. The proud yellow blooms turned into white fluffy paratroopers ready for deployment. Dandelions in my lawn were never uncommon -- but these were monstrously prolific.
I shook a defiant fist at Monsanto and refused to buy Round-Up or any other defoliant. I'm no naturist or activist, I'm just a cheapskate.
I mowed the dandelions down, leaving my lawn looking like the pocked scalp of the Jolly Green Giant with dandruff. Within days, most of the sprigs had regrown, dense and twisted. I tried a forked weeder tool, to extract the taproots and hopefully allow my Centipede grass to compete with hundreds of broad leaves out of the way.
Working outside in the warm sun felt good and I filled several lawn bags with dandelion roots and the broad leaves. And it worked well-enough, for about three weeks. The Centipede grass was doing well, but the dandelions adapted. The dandelions stalks were twisting together like Rat Kings and the broad leaves that usually lay flat against the ground were now growing upward, looking more like upside-down soup ladles.
Hmm. My weed problem was back. I looked up more natural dandelion remedies and high-strength 75% white vinegar seemed promising as a one-shot one-kill dandelion bullet, but the pricing was about the same as Round-Up -- did I mention I'm a cheapskate?
Mowing again, fork-weeding again, I dealt in sweat equity to combat the problem. Now it's late-June and I took an evening walk through the neighborhood and I'm not trying to besmirch my neighbors, but this dandelion crap is everywhere now. So, even if I get my dandelion salad bowl under control, all of their fluffy paratroopers are going to storm my placid green turf by July 4th, I guarantee.
Now, what I found out next, truly floored me -- my weed problem is part of yet another Conspiracy.
Taraxacum Koksaghyz, also known as a Russian Dandelion, has become an efficient replacement for the natural rubber tree liquid latex. https://phys.org/news/2009-09-dandelion-rubber.html
A fungal blight has posed a significant threat to natural rubber trees for more than a century. https://academic.oup.com/aob/article/100/6/1125/125277
There is a focused, agricultural and industrial effort to cultivate and refine dandelion latex for use as a viable substitute for natural rubber tree latex and rubber products. Bridgestone and Continental have emerged as the industrial leaders in Dandelion Rubber.
What does this have to do with my weed problem?
Well, well, well, wouldn't you know it, there's a big ol' humongous Bridgestone Tire Factory about 40 miles from my house. I hope they're proud of themselves. I wonder if I could bag up these dandelions and sell them to Bridgestone.
Would that make me a shill?
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